Hoping to get Santa baby to slip a present under the tree? Here are some (NSFW!) suggestions.
For The Giver
We go on and on about love around the holidays. “I love snow days! I love roasted chestnuts! I love caroling!” Aren’t you forgetting one very important type of love? We’ll spell it out for you. The holidays are freaking romantic! Think about it: you’re walking through the snow hand-in-hand and as you gaze in unison at a decked out Douglas Fir, your lovers grabs your waist and pulls you closer. What’s that? You suddenly feel a wave of warmth rush through your body. Is it the mulled wine? Nope, it’s you remembering that your partner is hella sexy and generous, and so are the holidays. Plus, you have all that extra vacation time on your hands. Might as well put a vibrator in one, amirite? So here’s what happens: you or bae (after the fastest game of rock, paper, scissors ever) take the HELLO TOUCH Wearable Vibrator, slap the wristband on, and attach the supple, silicon vibration pads to your fingers. After that, the top of the Rockefeller Center Tree is the limit. Anywhere hands can roam, these powerful vibrations can go.
For The Sexy Jetsetter
The mistletoe can’t do all the work. For centuries, it’s hung there, upside down and listless, waiting for the spiked eggnog to kick in so it can give fate a little nudge. With the old-fashioned romantic traditions of the season in mind, here’s a toy that makes the mistletoe obsolete (sorry, mistletoe, but that’s progress!) by allowing you and your partner to give and receive pleasure via a petite pen-shaped remote control and vibrator. We are pulled in more directions than a string of lights over the holiday season. There are company parties, family dinners, and last-minute work projects. While you’re thinking of a hot night under the blankets with your honey, you get an email saying your flight is delayed because of weather. Come on! You can’t let holiday chaos keep you from getting it on. The Dua by JeJoue lets you rock(ette) your lover’s world from afar, because your busy lifestyle can’t stop you from wanting them.
For The One That Lights Your Fire
You do it every holiday season. You walk around your favorite neighborhoods in search of the perfect romantic bar in which to seduce your boo like it’s the first time. And what makes a romantic bar unbeatable? A fireplace, of course. Now imagine if you had your own fireplace? Fab can help with that! Ok, slow down, we can’t install a fireplace in your apartment — your landlord wouldn’t like that — but stay with us! The Afterglow Massage Candle can light up your dark nights, no matter where you are. Can’t sweep your #1 off to a cabin in the woods, or impress them with your clap-on, clap-off gas fireplace? We got you. You can still give them a gift that burns with sensuality. Let your bodies be the tinder (pun intended) — and this little flame will give the gift of unforgettable intimacy. The musky rich scent warms and melts, becoming a silky massage oil that invites you to get hands-on. Bear skin rug and Marvin Gaye not required, but hey, you do you.
For The Love Adventurer
You and your lover are fearless in your passion, and the excitement of the holidays fuels your experimentation. You’re the couple that can’t wait till midnight to get things going. This season, your challenge is to create a night in 2015/16 (maybe at the same time?) that you’ll still be talking about in 2055. The Vegas Collection No.2 and No.3 can help you put on a fireworks show any night. Ooh by JeJoue has created this pick ‘n’ mix set to include a motor, classic vibrator, and cock ring to get the creative, experimental juices flowing. Might as well pop a bottle of champagne right now, because you know it’s gonna be a good year!
For The New Boo
Holidays come with their fair share of pressure, and your new boo has withstood it like a champ. Throughout it all — meeting your weird family, listening to your holiday shopping freak-outs, making you tea when you had that never-ending cold, etc. — the new boo persevered. Your new boo deserves a medal, or even better, a night of play and pleasure. The London Collection No. 1 & 3 is a mix & match set concocted by the great brains at Ooh by JeJoue that will transport you and your lover to your own private paradise. It includes a motor, a vibrating petal, a cock ring and a long list of sexy possibilities. Keep the infatuation going strong well into the new year!